Making friends could be overwhelming and intimidating. When you are in your 30’s you already have learned a lot and establish your own perception of the world. It’s a lot more difficult to find someone like you and very often the idea of others not liking you could be very frightening. When we grow up we no longer have the full acceptance to all our surroundings and we tend to judge more. We found less and less time to socializing and put effort to maintain a new friendship. When we are based in one place is a bit easier as we get to know our neighbor, we go to the same gym and get familiar with some faces if we have a dog we walk in the same park and make friends with other dog owners. The possibilities are endless.
But when you are constantly on the move and you never know how long you would stay in one place, your options are much limited and the fear of being rejected could grow even bigger. So what can you do?
First and most importantly, do not forget your childhood friends. The friends we made while trying to figure sh*t out are the most precious. Those are the friends that met us in our worse and yet still accept us and loved us through so much. So no matter where you are and what you do never ever give up on these friendships. I have a few friends that I would do anything for. No matter what time of the day they call me I would pick up the phone and listen to what they have to say, even if it’s just deciding what to wear to their grandma’s birthday. The most important to maintain friendships(especially from a distance) is Do Not call them only if you need them. Try to schedule a regular call (once a week, a month…) and try to be disciplined on it. No one like to be the only one who is calling and reaching out.
Even if you are fortune like I am and have some great friends back home, you would need some new friends and some new company while traveling. Here are a few of the things I do to meet people and make new friends.
- Facebook When I arrive in a new town that I know I will be staying for longer than 2 weeks I always look if the place has a facebook page for expats. It’s always a good start and trusts me if you are not fluent in the language of the country you are in you would be dying to speak with someone who understands you.
- Meet up Groups
This is a fairly new concept and does not expect to find a meetup group in small towns and villages, but for big cosmopolitan cities is a great option to find people with similar interests. Not many people see it this way but perhaps if you are looking to date this could also be a good option without feeling you are choosing dinner swiping left or right on a dating app. - Local community project.
Try to volunteer in a local community project. You can always research on the web and see what are the opportunity in your area or you can pay a visit to the local library and check their news board. - Popular coffee shop.
Try to make friends with your local coffee shop stuff. They meet a lot of interesting people every day and for sure would know some of the cool stuff happening in town. (The story behind the picture above is very funny. I was in New York and needed a haircut. I walked into a local salon and with my “just a trip” I got two great new friends. We end up drinking a couple of bottle of wines while getting our hair done. So you just never know 🙂 - Couchsurfing– At the beginning, I thought that Couchsurfing was only for free accommodation. But in some cities, I found some locals who were using the app to meet with travelers and learn English or another language.
- Workaway. If you are not aware of what workaway is you should totally check it out. It is a great platform to find free accommodation in return for some “work”, being that even just telling stories to a local family about your country and teaching them things you know best. The best part about workaway is that if you don’t want to “work” you can just message other travelers or even a local host and ask if they want to meet.
- Instagram. Yes, that’s right you can make new friends there too. You can check pictures from the place you are and see if someone post regularly from there. Then why not sending them a message and see what comes next.
- Internations.org.. This one has a lot of helpful information but its more for relocating to a new destination. Specialty because you need to pay to join the event and even have access to some of the info. But it’s a great place to find people from all over the world. Con-mainly is available in big cities.
- Join a tour.
Some time spending this extra cash on something fun and adventures could not only bring you great memories but could also bring you, great new friends. It’s a lot easier to make conversation when you have something in common. I found always easier when you are in a small boat going diving or snorkeling. Always need only one person to ask a question and then suddenly you know the whole life story of everyone ;-). The more adventures the trip is the more memorable and long-lasting the friendship would be. - Airbnb. It is always great to have the whole place just for yourself, but sometimes you might feel much better in a shared place where you can make friends with your host. If I’ about to pick a private room in a house/apartment I always try to search for places with reviews saying the host was very friendly and they become friends. Sadly this service now days is shifting a lot from what was originally design for but you can still find some great people out there who would welcome YOU, not your MONEY.
I’m sure I’m missing some other great ways and I would love to hear your way of making friends on the road. If you have a good one please share in the comments below or write me an email.
Just remember don’t be afraid of being yourself. 
Put the mask down and just be yourself. You have nothing to lose. today you are here tomorrow you are somewhere else You would be surprised to discover how refreshing is to meet someone real, someone, who is not pretending to be someone else just so to be accepted. It’s hard to reach out first especially if you are introvert by nature, but the reward you would get from new friendship is worth the effort.
